Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Blah,Blah,Blah

So here I am again. I suck at this blogging thing,but truthfully I haven't had the energy to blog. I just feel the depression & the stress dragging me down & I honestly hate the feeling,or maybe just the stupid hormones getting ahold of me since I've been taking this b/c pills. Honestly i'm hating them, they make me feel crazy lol.

I have so many people here supporting me & helping me out,but yet I feel so ALONE. I feel like none of my friends are there,like they've all vanished, when I need them the most & it hurts. I sit back & watch everyone run around,while i'm just here, no one offers to be around,or just simply ask how you're doing? I need things to take my mind off, but I try & there's nothing there.

Day in & day out, I do nothing. I actually cleaned up a bit today to get myself motivated & a few hours to keep my mind occupied. Depression is a shitty thing. I'm missing family,friends, everything that was there. But now it's just life flying by as I sit here & do nothing about it. This is a really depressing post,but I need to get it out somewhere, since no one is listening.

Sometimes I find myself thinking about everything going on & things that happened in the last few months,and it just makes me cry, as that's all I ever feel like doing now days the past week. I'm still trying to determine if it's really the stress & depression or just the stupid pills. But i think it's a combination of both,just the pills are making it worse. I wish it would just stop,I wanna be normal again.

Eh,i'll try to update again.
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2 comments:

  1. I suck at blogging too, I'm lucky if I even get out one post a week..

    I hope things start getting better for you. Maybe you can switch to a different b/c and see if that may be a part of how you're feeling? I had some types before do some crazy stuff to my emotions, made me feel like I was going crazy..

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  2. I'm sorry I haven't been much of a supportive friend. Maybe we could start walking the block together. I have been wanting to but I'm seriously struggling with the motivation to want to. Plus, I just want it to be warm already.

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